Thursday, January 17, 2008

VIAGRA INGREDIENTS REVEALED

I knew it......I knew it!


I knew they would finally release the ingredients in Viagra!


3% Vitamin E

2% Aspirin

2% GINSENG

1% Ma HUANG

5% Spray Starch

87% Fix-A-Flat

If Viagra doesn't work- Go Ci-alis!

WARNING- This turns into a mini-rant!

We also had a beautiful SNOW event in Lexington last night. It snowed huge wet flakes that covered the ground for several hours until it changed to rain and melted. There were some school and business delays this am but thankfully NO travel problems. We usually only get Ice and power outages. I know it's no big deal to some but maybe once a year in SC we get a little snow.

It was extra cool (he he) that it came and went with no power or travel problems! Also this weekend I think it's going to be 19 degrees too! I'll probably take a quick shower and run out and lay naked on the dirt road and see what freezes! May not need the Viagra- course It may be Turtle Time with some probably serious serious shrinkage--but it's for show only after 25 years of marriage.
Kinda like a Peacock- "he he he h eh he he said cock" Beavis voice.....this concludes my pre-pubescent post and I'll now return to adulthood.

My Right Big Toe hurts so bad as I recently found out I have the friggin' gout and have been standing and working 12 hour shifts and eating Motrin. I finally found out my Uric Acid had been climbing for the past 18 weeks. (During my routine labs while I took the freakin' Tuberculosis Preventative INH meds because I work around 3rd World immigrants who frequent our Urgent Scare. The Health Dept Nurse is awesome, but whle picking up my last bottle she said "Oh, by the way.........Your Uric acid has been going up for the past 18 weeks!!!! I'm on Allopurinol now and it should feel better soon! Last Tuesday a patient came in in a wheelchair with the toe cut out of his shoe screaming for a pain shot for Gout in his Big toe. I hit him in the head with a clipboard and took his vitals and limped off! -I'm working 12 hours and your crying! Course it is supposed so painful you can hardly stand it so I may just have a mild case. Even though my Uric Acid is 10.6 and normal is less than 5.5 ! Ok- enough about how macho I am! LOL.- OK back to the TB- sounds like a Bad Law firm- Phlegm-Lugee & Hocker! Oh I just grossed my own self out! I don't do sputum at all! Trauma, Blood and beer, feces, vomit- No problemo---but Lung Boogers- OMG I gotta quit!

Hey- I love em and they deserve care too- 98% of them are LEGAL residents and very hard workers and contribute greatly to our local economy and tax base. As well as sharing their Tuberculosis with us! I don't HAVE TB- thank the Lord the X-ray was OK- but I had to take the preventative. My toe had been hurting for about 4 years since I jerked a wooden pallet into it while working retail- stocking @ Kohl's for 6.50 an hour from 10:00 pm until 6:00 am- locked in the Department store. Putting up Vacuum Cleaners, Plates, Clothes, pricing sale items, unloading tucks. Hence the pallet!!!! So I thought it was just like Uncle Arthur had moved into my Toe due to my stupidity & since Motrin completely stopped the pain I didn't really think "Gout" specifically.

It's amazing what you can and will do when you swallow your pride and it doesn't fill your belly-- and Hunger is a phenomenal Motivator! I loved the experience and you do what you have to do for the family! I begged for jobs for a year, but there really weren't any. I honestly could not get hired at Fast Food restaurants!!!!! I had quit working for the Dr. I worked for for 10 years and wanted to go back to the ER and school. Note to self: NEVER QUIT A JOB BEFORE YOU HAVE ANOTHER ONE!

Why am I writing all this??? I don't know either but it felt good and cathartic. Which is akin to a giant Fart. Sorry- I digress again. But my pants fit better now. My dogs pissed....but hers will kill small children! OK- that's about it. I have some really cool posts- (I think they are) coming up and I'll probably do just one a day- so keep popping in.

I Love all my Cyber buddies and hope every one has a great weekend coming up!

Blessings,

John

13 comments:

  1. Glad the TB didn't get you. That's scary shit.

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  2. Amen!!! Hope you are feeling well!!!!!

    J

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  3. You know, I don't know if it should scare me that most of that made perfect sense to me or not.

    Either way, glad you don't have the TB :)

    Epi

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  4. LMAO----EPI----JOIN THE CLUB--IT'S TOO LATE- YOU'RE ONE OF US NOW!!!! lol

    WELCOME ABOARD!!!

    I'LL STOP BY SOON----OK TO LINK YO YA?

    JOHN

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  5. HAHAHAH :P HOW ARE JOHN?

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  6. Hi Kaylee- where ya been? Hope you are well. I'm doing great!!!

    John

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  7. Sorry to hear about your gout - strange it seems such an old-fashioned disease - sort of like TB which I hear is making a come-back.

    Carry on carrying on

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  8. jeannie-

    I have TB and Gout- so I'm definitely going RETRO! The great thing is is that I have NO Herpes or HIV! And the TB is not active- I've just had an exposure. Some benefits for being a Health Care worker huh?

    But thanks for reminding me I'm OLD! Having Gout, TB and All. I'll see if I can't get Bubonic Plague or some chit from the 15th century for ya!

    I'll swing by and say hello. Looks like we're gonna get some more snow in SC today!

    Seriously- Thanks for always stopping by!

    Have a good one,

    john

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  9. Sorry to hear you were dealing with Gout. I do hear it is extremely painful. "spray starch" - lol

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  10. I hope you are feeling much better by now John. sorry to hear you had to work with that kind of pain.

    My aunt and uncle moved down to Alabama from the north and they said if they got an inch of snow that it stopped everything down there because they weren't used to driving in it. It must be exciting when you southerners get snow and cold weather...well unless it hurts the crops.

    viagra joke funny! :)

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  11. Hiya Sea!!!

    Yeah- we're a little "Flaky" when it comes to snow down here! :-)

    Angel- Thanks!!! Both you and Sea are so sewwt it feels good knowing you're both out there! It really does. Kinda like a little "ARMY"!!!!!

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