Wednesday, September 9, 2009


The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling..

And even more beautiful is, knowing that you are the reason behind it!!!


1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir
Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned
out to be an optical Aleutian

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it
was a weapon of math disruption.

5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in
his work.

6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum

9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are
looking into it.

12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to
the other, 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'

14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'

16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When
his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'

17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium
at large.

20. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a
seasoned veteran.

21. A backward poet writes inverse.

22. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your
count that votes.

23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

24. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!

I don't know why it's always been said that puns are the lowest form of humor. I think it takes quick wit, and a brain to catch a lot of puns and statements. I live off of puns, especially in everyday conversations.
There are some opportunities in life that are just hung out there for you; and set up so perfectly that you just have to say them!I can't help it- they are punny!


  1. I love cannibal jokes, so #23 is my favorite. What was the one about giving the cannibal the cold shoulder?? I remember loving that joke as a kid...

    Anyway, ayayay, Juansito...what am I gonna do wid ju? You always leave me laughing out loud like an "idiota" when I read your comments on my blog. You should write for a sitcom! Seriously.

    Un abrazo,
    your leetle fren, Escarlet

  2. Scarlet,

    Thank you! And it's funny because I usually am Sitting when I do my blog, so maybe that would work out.....

    Did I send you one about the Two Cannibals eating and one said to the other, "I can't stand your Mother-in Law!"

    The other said, "Then just eat the Potatoes!"


  3. Where do you find these things? you are hilarious!


    Thank you for the comedy relief. :)

    Oh..I have a boring post up about cardi coats.. but I thought it said cardiac coats. i feel like there is humor there but just can't tap into it.

    so..if there was a such thing as a cardiac coat..what would it do> why would it exist?

    if you feel creative..i will add your no doubt hilarius take on a cardiac coat to bottom of post. don't feel obligated. But..I'll credit you of course.

  4. Absolutely wonderful! Loved them all.

  5. Thank you my adoring serfs! You may rise!


    It's good to be King!

    Didn't Mel Brooks keep saying that in History of the Worlds parts 1 and deaux? Anyway, it's funny, No?

  6. I physically assaulted a woman who told puns... I like Limericks!

  7. lmao!!!!!

    Limericks are awesome also.

    Magicians are known for their tricks,
    Most make very good picks,
    They show up in Vegas
    and hassle the waitress
    by waving their Buffalodicks!

    Just for you my friend, on the spot!



Incredibly smart relies: