Saturday, August 8, 2009



Taking out the trash is an adventure.

I was leaving the house to take the trash down to the end of the road, and as I opened the gate I put my hand on this dude in the dark. Yes, it freaked me out but I did not scream. (not loudly).

When I get the Garbage can- a rolling monstrosity that would hold a VW to the end of the dirt/sand road, (about .2 miles). I shined the flashlight down and found this dude.

This guy I found during the day. He was hard enough to spot in broad daylight! You just have to walk slowly and look with "Woods eyes". I used to practice this before hunting season to get my eyes used to the woods. That was when I hunted. I've since learned it's much more satisfying with a Camera. You just have to sneak up closer to club them to death with it. I may go back to my gun! I was just walking slowly around the pond to find things God made up and spotted this guy. I think He did such a good job making stuff that He wanted to share it, and had Adam name them just to mess with his head!! I've always loved Praying Mantis's, especially cause after sex the female eats the head off the male first.

Good eyes or what? Good design or what? Check out the camoflage. This is wayyyyyyy before Mossy Oak!
More Woods Eyes. GEICO my butt. It was his accent that got him the gig!
Woods Eyes! Or the Shrooms are kicking in big time, because I did find myself singing Karma, Karma, Karma Chameleon, by Boy George over and over. (And it sounded GOOD!)

What happens when you eat too much fiber! This is all that's left of a Pine Cone after a Gray Squirrel finished with it. Or Wild Bear Crap- Not sure.

I found a Spider today hiding in the coolest of webs in the most awesome spot on a Pine Tree Limb. I Literally peeled this thing out of a Cocoon of silk/web that was so tough, Peter Parker would have been proud. And then from just the right position you can see the webs, but you have to be in the right place with the sun in exactly the right position to ever know they were there. I've walked by them all my life and just discovered this thing today. God hid them from the Birds.
I'll have to get another picture of him cuz it's a lot out of focus and this thing looks like an alien. Plus I admit I did lick the Toad before I left, as I heard they had "Medicinal" properties. I think I licked Him/Her? in the wrong spot though because it followed me home.

Below is a pic of his "Nest" of innocent looking pine needles, and his Cocoon was inside the needles with the web transparent around the outside.

I'll go ahead and put the fuzzy one up- this is not two spiders. It appears he has a "shell" on his back, but that is his body, and it mimics it's head. They are about the same size. It is freaky deaky. And I don't know why it was so out of focus. The two small black dots in the v of the pine needle are the actual eyes, with a greyish cone shaped nose, and two legs on either side. The two dots that are slightly bigger and higher are fake eyes and are on that back, body thing. It looks like two mating or piggyback, but it is actually only one Spider.
I could not get up the guts to lick it.

It was getting late the day I found Alien Spider, and it was hot. It was hot and muggy when I took the trash down the next night, and knowing how important it is to stay hydrated-------well, Hydrated I stayed!

Did I mention it was Hot? On Screened in porch after sun had set. 92 degrees!!!! but the Humidity was only 62% so there was no Heat Index. Comforting huh? I was downright chilly!

I was very lucky to find these to eat along the way back home. Flatus Hallucinogatus, or FartShrooms as we call them locally. You have to be very careful as a novice may eat the wrong kind, and instead of hallucinating- He will shit his pants. These we OK!

Needless to say by the time I got home from taking the trash down Thursday night, it was Saturday morning; and I swear I kept hearing Hammer yelling something about Arby's, and Tartar sauce! Anyway I had to Pee Like a Racehorse and I want you to finally see just exactly what it looks like when a Race Horse Pees. Wee Wee edited out:

Woods eyes- you think you could see the frog from plane????? I did!
Usually I walk looking around a certain radius of my feet, for the obvious reason-Snakes. Both to find, and to make sure I FIND FIRST!!!! Thank goodness I started looking ahead and around or I would've walked right into this Wasps' nest. They would have put a hurting on me for certain.

I take that back- they almost look like Yellow Jackets, but they usually live in the ground don't they? Heck it doesn't matter- they all Sting!

WOODS EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Berrry Berry Impotant!!!!!

OK- Now for the Pee pics as promised, and BOY DID I HAVE TO GO!!!!!!!

Getting started is always the hardest part.

But once you get er going.......


A Little for my Magnolia that I dug up out of the woods.....Cool for free huh?

OK, OK- I'm Just showing OFF! But it took me years to perfect this!

Now This is sickening. I moved a board at the "POND". It's just a low area that catches Rainwater and can get stagnant, although this year has been exceptional. Anyway, I turned over a Board where I had found a Water Snake a few days before, and I was either tripping my butt off, or some numb nuts, in the past throw out an Oil Filter or dumped some oil here. This was what floated up out of clear water.

It started small and literally bubbled up out of the ground... could be gasoline, but I don't think it would last that long.

Let's end on a prettier note. I go back to the Cardiologist next week for my 3 week check. I'm also apply for a teaching position for Medical Office Assistants as a Lab Instructor, like I mentioned, so please pray if that's what I'm supposed to do- I'll do it. I've made up my mind that my Life and Wife are more important than work and strife! (Dang I'm good.) I can't go back to 13,14 and 16 hour days and expect to stay healthy! I'm sure they will work with me at Urgent Scare and definitely would transfer me to the Main Hospital. But I can't sit at a desk and register people or do guest services. It's just not me.

Of course I'll be smart and burn no bridges, and maybe even do some PRN work at UC, to keep my foot in the door. But I want to walk around all day, every day and do just what I just did. Take Pictures, observe, think, Communicate with great people like you.

Teach others some of the things I've learned so they too can give back to the Community. Also, so they won't (maybe) have to make the same stupid mistakes I did. Although I think that's unavoidable. It's built into maturing, and is the way we absolutely learn. Until you touch the hot burner, and scream in pain with butter dripping on the floor that your mom just put on your throbbing hand, you will NOT believe the burner was hot, just like Mom said it was. Yes, I know you don't use butter now cause it's bad for your Cholesterol or some dumb butt thing like that. You use 99.95 burn cream that YO'bama will make sure you get after a 14 hour ER wait or a 6 week Doctor's (NOT OF YOUR CHOICE) appointment!

For my next pictoral foray (all pics by John so no stealing here) will be a POP up Story, if I can figure that one out! I also would like to upload these pics faster, so I think I'll reload them back up to Picassa and learn how to post them over here again. I'd like to possibly add sound effects, narrate or add music, so I need to do some research on how to that on Blogger. I need to keep it simple, fun and not too terribly time consuming. NOT, a PowerPoint show, something different, only similar. Send money---thousands and thousands and I'll stay home. I'll be checking the mail-box regularly! LOL!

G'Night & God Bless you all! Click.


  1. truly pehenomenal! sometimes we think the inside of the hospital is the scariest part of the world unti these encounters with the slimy, et. lol! nice to meet you!

  2. I enjoyed the nature walk!

    We used to search to see a bug we called a walking stick at our cottage. And salamanders. And turtles and such.

    All the best for the new position.

  3. Cherie,

    Very nice to meet you indeed! Thanks for dropping in. Hope I didn't scare you away with the weirdness. Have a Good Sunday.


    Thank You!!!!!!


  4. John, you think you can possibly scare us with your weirdness?? You're going to have to try a lot harder, my little "fren."

    Speaking of little friends, wow, you have them all photographed on this post...and the first little guy is cute (from here). It's spiders and snakes I have a problem with.

    Love the cool pics at the end. You can do some cool tricks with a camera...I had no idea. Keep up the good work, amigo! :)

    Happy Sunday, my fren!

  5. Thanks Scarlet,

    And as always may God continue to keep you in the palm of His hand, and bless you and yours!

    Much Love in Christ,

    Bro Juan.


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