SKEETER HAWK DOWN & BAD PUNS TYME!
Can you see the Frog Underneath the Limb?
I didn't know he was there until I "developed" the pic!
Tree Psychic: I see a small shrub around you...did you lose someone you loved?
Hay Ha ha HAY heeee hahahahahahahahahahah!
Remember Woody's Laugh...laughing IS contagious but I hear they are coming up with a vaccine. I hear it has a British Humour element to it! DRY!
PUNS YOU WISH YOU'D NEVER READ!
A compilation of puns, none unfortunately can I claim as original material. These just grow and morph on there own, so to Whomever penned these- Thanks.
Lexiphiles (I. e., "lovers of words" you know . . . . Like. ...
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish . . . Or, I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. .... Then it hit me . . . . Etc.).
Well, here we go!
To write with a broken pencil is . . . Pointless.
When fish are in schools they sometimes . . . Take debate.
A thief who stole a calendar . . . Got twelve months.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles . . . U.C.L.A.
The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes . . . Was on shaky ground.
The batteries were given out . . . Free of charge.
A dentist and a manicurist married . . . They fought tooth and nail.
A will is a . . . Dead giveaway.
If you don't pay your exorcist . . . You can get repossessed.
With her marriage, she got a new name . . . And a dress.
Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you . . . A-flat miner.
You are stuck with your debt if . . . You can't budge it.
Local Area Network in Australia: . . . The LAN down under.
A boiled egg is . . . Hard to beat.
When you've seen one shopping center . . . You've seen a mall.
Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was . . .
Resisting a rest.
Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? . . . He’s all right now.
If you take a laptop computer for a run you could. ... Jog your memory.
A bicycle can't stand alone; . . . It is two tired.
In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, . . . it's
your Count that votes.
When a clock is hungry. ... It goes back four seconds
The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine . . . Was fully recovered.
He had a photographic memory . . . Which was never developed.
Those who get too big for their britches will be . . . Exposed in the end.
When she saw her first strands of gray hair . . . She thought she'd dye.
Acupuncture: . . . A jab well done.
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish . . . Or, I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. .... Then it hit me . . . . Etc.).
Well, here we go!
To write with a broken pencil is . . . Pointless.
When fish are in schools they sometimes . . . Take debate.
A thief who stole a calendar . . . Got twelve months.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles . . . U.C.L.A.
The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes . . . Was on shaky ground.
The batteries were given out . . . Free of charge.
A dentist and a manicurist married . . . They fought tooth and nail.
A will is a . . . Dead giveaway.
If you don't pay your exorcist . . . You can get repossessed.
With her marriage, she got a new name . . . And a dress.
Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you . . . A-flat miner.
You are stuck with your debt if . . . You can't budge it.
Local Area Network in Australia: . . . The LAN down under.
A boiled egg is . . . Hard to beat.
When you've seen one shopping center . . . You've seen a mall.
Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was . . .
Resisting a rest.
Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? . . . He’s all right now.
If you take a laptop computer for a run you could. ... Jog your memory.
A bicycle can't stand alone; . . . It is two tired.
In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, . . . it's
your Count that votes.
When a clock is hungry. ... It goes back four seconds
The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine . . . Was fully recovered.
He had a photographic memory . . . Which was never developed.
Those who get too big for their britches will be . . . Exposed in the end.
When she saw her first strands of gray hair . . . She thought she'd dye.
Acupuncture: . . . A jab well done.
You are loved!
JMc
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Incredibly smart relies: