Saturday, March 27, 2010

FEELING HUMAN AGAIN

 A BRIGHTER OUTLOOK- ESPECIALLY LOOKING UP!
CAROLINA BLUE SKY!


I'M SO SORRY I RUINED MY WIFE'S 40TH HIGH SCHOOL REUNION, BUT SHE WAS SO GRACIOUS ABOUT IT! AS IF SHE WOULD EVER BE ANYTHING ELSE! I WAS TRULY TOUCHED WHEN I SAW HOW MANY OF HER CLASSMATES, THAT WERE ALREADY DOWN THERE, SUPPORTED HER WITH WELL WISHES AND PRAYED FOR ME.

I KNOW WITHOUT A DOUBT- THAT IS WHY I'M FEELING SO MUCH BETTER SO FAST!

GOD IS GOOD, ALL THE TIME;
ALL THE TIME, GOD IS GOOD.

THAT IS SO HARD FOR ANYONE GOING THROUGH TRIALS, STRESSES, LOSS, TRAUMA, DEPRESSION, LONELINESS, ETC., TO BELIEVE. IT IS SOMETHING I'VE MULLED OVER MANY TIMES IN MY HEAD. BOOKS HAVE BEEN WRITTEN ABOUT IT;
WHY BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE, ETC!

IT'S ALMOST LIKE A SLAP IN THE FACE. FOR SOMEONE GOING THROUGH IT TO HEAR WORDS LIKE THOSE IN BLUE ABOVE!



I DON'T CARE IF GOD HAS ALL THE ANSWERS, SEES THE BIG PICTURE, KNOWS WHATS BEST, AND ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER, AND KEEP YOUR CHIN UP, AND MY GRACE IS SUFFICIENT FOR THEE, AND PRAY WITHOUT CEASING, AND TAKE NO THOUGHT OF TOMORROW, AND I WILL BE WITH YOU ALWAYS, AND I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU NOR FORSAKE YOU-----

BIG BREATH!!!!!!!!

PAIN, LOSS, TRAUMA, TRIALS:

STILL SUCK!

VERY CHRISTLIKE , YES? NO, BUT VERY HONEST!

BUT I HAVE ALWAYS FOUND IN MY OWN LIFE: ALL THE ABOVE TO BE TRUE. I DO BELIEVE IN HIS WORD TOTALLY, AND LOVE HIM AS MUCH AS I, HUMANLY CAN!
I CERTAINLY HAVE MORE QUESTIONS THAN ANSWERS AFTER ALMOST 30 YEARS OF ASKING HIM FOR A RELATIONSHIP.

IT'S A LIFELONG JOURNEY.
TIME ALWAYS REVEALS HIM TO BE RIGHT. EVEN THOUGH TO ME IT SUCKED.

I WILL CONTINUE MY RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM, BECAUSE OF THE PROFOUND CHANGE HE DID INSIDE ME SOME 29 PLUS TEARS AGO. THAT WORK WAS REAL TO ME! THAT'S WHY I BELIEVE. IT CHANGED JOHN....FOREVER.

TO QUOTE FROM A RECENT MOVIE:
"THE CLIMB IS TOUGH!"

"BUT THE VIEW IS MAGNIFICENT!"
(HANNAH MONTANA-I THINK)

I ALWAYS HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT, AND BESIDES, EVERYTHING I TRIED UP UNTIL THAT POINT HAD FAILED MISERABLY, TO FILL THE VOID IN MY HEART-SOUL!!!! OR TO MAKE ME HAPPIER!


YOU REAP WHAT YOU SEW! AN ILLUSTRATION IN FAITH


THE RESULT OF MY LABOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


IRISH CLOVER: A BEAUTIFUL PLANT WITH AWESOME COLORS AND THE MOST DELICATE PALE PURPLE FLOWER YOU HAVE EVER SEEN



THIS WAS LAST SUMMER: IT WAS WHAT I SOWED IN THE FALL. IN DIRT! WHEN I SOWED IT, I DIDN'T SEE IT- BUT I HAD FAITH I WOULD IN TIME. AND ONLY BECAUSE THE SEED PACKET HAD THIS PICTURE ON IT AND SAID IT WOULD COME UP IN LATE SPRING/ EARLY SUMMER.!

I HAD NO OTHER ASSURANCES...IT'S KINDA LIKE GOD'S WORD, SAYING OR GIVING US CERTAIN PROMISES. I SURE DON'T SEE THEM YET, BUT IF I SEW (BELIEVE, KEEP IT WATERED, DARE TO BELIEVE, IN SPITE OF WHAT I SEE????...I WONDER WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN?




YUK!
THIS IS THE SAME POT TAKEN A WEEK AGO. NOT LOOKING  AS  GOOD AS IT DID LAST SUMMER, HUH? DANG, I WONDER IF I SHOULD GIVE UP ON IT AND DUMP IT???

CIRCUMSTANCES, SEASONS, TIME HAD CHANGED AND THIS WAS THE RESULT!

BUT THEN:   I REMEMBERED.......
  
  IT LOOKED JUST LIKE THIS, THIS TIME THE YEAR BEFORE, WORSE THAN WHEN I FIRST SEWED THE SEED.  AT LEAST THE DIRT LOOKED GOOD! BUT, IN SPITE OF APPEARANCES, I ONCE AGAIN HAD FAITH IT WOULD RETURN, EVEN THOUGH IT DIDN'T LOOK TO PROMISING! BUT THIS TIME I HAD SEEN PREVIOUS RESULTS, SO IT WAS A LITTLE EASIER TO BELIEVE!!



WHAT I EXPECT: HOPE FOR: BELIEVE IN

AND SURE ENOUGH.....IT WILL COME BACK. HOW DO I KNOW? BECAUSE THIS IS THE 10TH YEAR, AND IT HAS COME BACK ALL 9 YEARS BEFORE IT....SO WHY SHOULD THIS SUMMER BE ANY DIFFERENT?

I'LL TAKE A PICTURE IN ABOUT 6 WEEKS! AND LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

WHAT HAVE I GOT TO LOSE?



I PLANTED THESE THIS SPRING!! I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT COMES UP.

WITH MY LUCK IT'LL BE TIGER WOODS AND HE'LL SLEEP WITH MY WIFE!